Saturday, December 8, 2012
Tuesday, May 1, 2012
I used to be weird and quirky and fun. Now I'm just tired. And I guess I'm still weird, but there is not enough leftover to be still quirky. I miss that part of me.
Don't worry, I won't lament here, but all you mommies can probably help me out with this. Where has Kelly gone? I never thought I would define myself as "a mom." Not that I never thought I'd BE a mom, just not be completely defined by being one.
I know and have heard that each stage passes so fast and we have to cherish each moment---right now I want to add BLAH BLAH BLAH to that. My two year old has a mouth sassier than a teenager. My four year old got in trouble at school today BIG TIME-sent to the office TWICE and EJ, well, he's still just the little guy on the tit (hahaha).
Here are a few steps I'm taking to continue to know who I am. The babies will turn 19 and be gone in the blink of an eye and I need to make sure that there is some Kelly left standing.
1 Peter 3 and Proverbs 31:10 and on. This is who I'm called to be. A woman totally devoted to her husband and children. A daughter of God in heaven who is seeking eternal life through Jesus Christ. A servant. Compassionate, forgiving, kind, meek, Lord help me! I don't know even HOW to begin to be all of those things.
>>>>Lately I have been feeling so selfish and more like a deranged drill sargent.<<<<
I ran today. for almost 25 minutes. Mostly uphill. It felt so empowering for Carlton to tell me that I have a strong mind. That compliment propelled me up and on when everything was burning and I wanted to give up.
I blogged, emailed and called a friend today.
I dressed up in a beautiful and cheap skirt, put on some lip gloss and felt very pretty when my hubs complimented me. (Then I took the outfit immediately off before EJ could spit up on it)
I made silly jokes with Autumn when I really just wanted to scream about all of the constant cleaning I have to do.
I snapped into teacher-mode when I found out that Noah got in trouble at school today. Talking and making sense of big concepts to little Noah instead of just spanking him. I realized that God gave ME this special little fella because HE believes I can raise him and raise him well.
I kissed EJ incessantly on the nose. So much that he spit up on me and grew quite cross-eyed. This has nothing to do with rediscovering me, but it felt good to slow down and cherish the moment that is now in fact so quickly gone.
There were still traces of drill sargent, but also traces of Kelly today. I am so glad and grateful about this.
Friday, April 13, 2012
3 kids=smarter mommy
things I've learned w/ 3:
hot dogs are a staple for the lunch menu
the baby wil ALWAYS poop thru his clothes or spit up out his nose when the two year old starts a temper tantrum
big brothers love to help (way to go noah!!!)
it is really okay to tell your kids "get your ASS on the bed, NOW!!" (yes, guilty as charged)
a poop on the floor is still one less diaper
a three minute time out can easily be stretched to 14 minutes or longer
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go clean a poop off the floor...
hot dogs are a staple for the lunch menu
the baby wil ALWAYS poop thru his clothes or spit up out his nose when the two year old starts a temper tantrum
big brothers love to help (way to go noah!!!)
it is really okay to tell your kids "get your ASS on the bed, NOW!!" (yes, guilty as charged)
a poop on the floor is still one less diaper
a three minute time out can easily be stretched to 14 minutes or longer
Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go clean a poop off the floor...
Friday, March 9, 2012
the big let down
We are now a family of five. Add the boys and the total is up to nine. Wow, our own strange little brady bunch-esque family.
Oh yeah, and the snake can count as a member too because I don't know how long he was bunking in our basement. Since I can't talk specifics about the boys, I will simply refer to them as boy1 and boy2 for the recount of last night's alabama adventure.
background info: Brought EJ home from the hospital on Tuesday night. This is the first time since the fire that I have been utterly off duty. Carlton is still not back to work, but our home continues to run with staff and boys. This means me in the apartment able to hear pretty much everything that is said or done in the main part of the house.
Just putting N and A to bed at the end of a super exhausting day. Mom went home in the morning and I was still absolutely hit up from the c-section and engorgement combo. Add three little ones to the mix and I was a sight to see to say the least.
So, I'm in their room and it's ten-ish and I hear voices outside of our apartment. I'm thinking "why on earth are the boys still up this late?" I move to the door to listen and hear a discussion ensuing about a snake in the basement. Then the staff that was working tells one of the boys "I don't know about that, let me go talk to Ms. Kelly" (footsteps, three knowcks on my door)
I do a silent sprint into N and A's room and jump into their bed, because #1 I am not working and #2 did someone say SNAKE IN THE BASEMENT???!!!
Waited till tonight to find out the scoop. boy1 and boy2 are in the basement and boy1 drops a battery on the floor and it rolls under the couch. boy2 says "hey, I'm gonna lift this couch up and you tell me what's under it." (Noah really likes to show how big, strong, brave, etc. he is. I have learned that this is something most boys of any age enjoy.)
So he lifts the couch-with one hand, I presume, and tells boy2 to look under there "what do you see?"
boy2: a snake
boy1: (drops the couch and RUNS upstairs)
boy2 goes up after him "to get my shoes so he doesn't bite my toe." and proceeds to ask the staff if he can "fittin to kill that snake." Man I'm glad that brave kid and I share a roof!
Someone in my house is talking about KILLING A SNAKE IN MY BASEMENT. Freaky.
He did not kill the snake, but he snake wrangled it and took it outside to be free. That's great until I think that he had a nice little snake home goin on down there and he will probably invite all his snake friends to have a snake partay in here this summer when it is 1,000 degrees outside. I've gotta get some Lime ASAP!
Oh and the title is a reference to the let down reflex. I am perplexed as to why it lets down at the strangest times. Let down is a sweet term meaning that my boobs start to pour milk like rain all over everywhere, with no rhyme or reason and only when there is no possible way for me to reach a new pad or extra burp cloth, shirt, etc. It's Murphy's law, I guess. Sort of like how the one time the clean diaper slips on the floor is the first time EJ tries to poop and pee on me simultaneously during the diaper change. Let the games begin...
Oh yeah, and the snake can count as a member too because I don't know how long he was bunking in our basement. Since I can't talk specifics about the boys, I will simply refer to them as boy1 and boy2 for the recount of last night's alabama adventure.
background info: Brought EJ home from the hospital on Tuesday night. This is the first time since the fire that I have been utterly off duty. Carlton is still not back to work, but our home continues to run with staff and boys. This means me in the apartment able to hear pretty much everything that is said or done in the main part of the house.
Just putting N and A to bed at the end of a super exhausting day. Mom went home in the morning and I was still absolutely hit up from the c-section and engorgement combo. Add three little ones to the mix and I was a sight to see to say the least.
So, I'm in their room and it's ten-ish and I hear voices outside of our apartment. I'm thinking "why on earth are the boys still up this late?" I move to the door to listen and hear a discussion ensuing about a snake in the basement. Then the staff that was working tells one of the boys "I don't know about that, let me go talk to Ms. Kelly" (footsteps, three knowcks on my door)
I do a silent sprint into N and A's room and jump into their bed, because #1 I am not working and #2 did someone say SNAKE IN THE BASEMENT???!!!
Waited till tonight to find out the scoop. boy1 and boy2 are in the basement and boy1 drops a battery on the floor and it rolls under the couch. boy2 says "hey, I'm gonna lift this couch up and you tell me what's under it." (Noah really likes to show how big, strong, brave, etc. he is. I have learned that this is something most boys of any age enjoy.)
So he lifts the couch-with one hand, I presume, and tells boy2 to look under there "what do you see?"
boy2: a snake
boy1: (drops the couch and RUNS upstairs)
boy2 goes up after him "to get my shoes so he doesn't bite my toe." and proceeds to ask the staff if he can "fittin to kill that snake." Man I'm glad that brave kid and I share a roof!
Someone in my house is talking about KILLING A SNAKE IN MY BASEMENT. Freaky.
He did not kill the snake, but he snake wrangled it and took it outside to be free. That's great until I think that he had a nice little snake home goin on down there and he will probably invite all his snake friends to have a snake partay in here this summer when it is 1,000 degrees outside. I've gotta get some Lime ASAP!
Oh and the title is a reference to the let down reflex. I am perplexed as to why it lets down at the strangest times. Let down is a sweet term meaning that my boobs start to pour milk like rain all over everywhere, with no rhyme or reason and only when there is no possible way for me to reach a new pad or extra burp cloth, shirt, etc. It's Murphy's law, I guess. Sort of like how the one time the clean diaper slips on the floor is the first time EJ tries to poop and pee on me simultaneously during the diaper change. Let the games begin...
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
"What's goin on?"
Yes, Marvin Gaye's (I think that's who it is)song is in my head right now.
MICHIGAN!!!
Just got a few pics from when we went to Michigan a month ago. This past month has ZIPPED by. Grandma got really sick and we left to go see her. She got to hang out with me and the kiddos three times before she passed away. We have a great bereavement policy so we were back in the hand for almost two whole weeks:) Once I find my camera cord, I will upload pics and post what I wrote about those last visits. For the first time in my life, I was CERTAIN that the person in the casket would wake up in heaven. That is an awesome peace.
Pics of N and A with their cousins of the same age:
BACK TO WORK AND SCHOOL
We returned to me having to sift through a total of ten weeks of Medicaid billing, and write and submit a 20 page paper. Medicaid is the worst thing to have to go back through, correct, or re-organize. I have never seen any type of paperwork snowball as fast, or deep as this does. Then the boys were off of school and N & A too, so all you parents know how that goes...7 kids all day every day, lots of busy-ness.
Oh, and I got my grade-an A-horray!!! My GPA is a 3.857. I never cared much about it before, but I am very pleased with this fact! I decided that I need to really focus on my kids and the Big C for now so I did not start class on Monday. EJ will be here in 7 weeks and the class goes for ten. Between everything else that has gone down lately, my degree will have to take the back burner (pun to myself because the fire started on the back burner).
"MY FIRE DADDY"
That's what Autumn just stopped saying. She actually saw Carlton catch on fire! Two days ago, she wandered to the spot in the kitchen floor that burned from the pot of grease, and sat right on it. She had her blanket and paci and was just kind of looking around. I think it was her way of making peace with the whole fire thing. She has not mentioned it again, and seems soooooo much more content now that Carlton is home.
BABY #3 AND HOME HEALTH NURSE
He's due in 7 weeks now. Hopefully Carlton will be somewhat healed by then. Last night C got up out of bed and ended up quickly back in because of pain and lightheadedness. He will have a home nurse come out to help me change his dressings every other day. Being a caretaker for your husband is something I didn't think I would experience for decades!
It is a really amazing experience, but I have to stay prayed up for the Lord's strength because it is very taxing mentally, emotionally and physically. Prob increased bc of #3's incessant growing. I have a newfound appreciation and compassion for anyone who has ever been a caretaker themselves. And my husb is not terminally ill, paralyzed or any number of awful circumstances, Plus, it's only day three of me doing it. I've got my head around his 11 medications (11!) and just re-wrapped his arm for the second time since midnight, so I am totally getting the hang of it. Thinking I should have listened to C eons ago and gotten my nursing degree.
"Awwww, mercy, mercy me......"
MICHIGAN!!!
Just got a few pics from when we went to Michigan a month ago. This past month has ZIPPED by. Grandma got really sick and we left to go see her. She got to hang out with me and the kiddos three times before she passed away. We have a great bereavement policy so we were back in the hand for almost two whole weeks:) Once I find my camera cord, I will upload pics and post what I wrote about those last visits. For the first time in my life, I was CERTAIN that the person in the casket would wake up in heaven. That is an awesome peace.
Pics of N and A with their cousins of the same age:
BACK TO WORK AND SCHOOL
We returned to me having to sift through a total of ten weeks of Medicaid billing, and write and submit a 20 page paper. Medicaid is the worst thing to have to go back through, correct, or re-organize. I have never seen any type of paperwork snowball as fast, or deep as this does. Then the boys were off of school and N & A too, so all you parents know how that goes...7 kids all day every day, lots of busy-ness.
Oh, and I got my grade-an A-horray!!! My GPA is a 3.857. I never cared much about it before, but I am very pleased with this fact! I decided that I need to really focus on my kids and the Big C for now so I did not start class on Monday. EJ will be here in 7 weeks and the class goes for ten. Between everything else that has gone down lately, my degree will have to take the back burner (pun to myself because the fire started on the back burner).
"MY FIRE DADDY"
That's what Autumn just stopped saying. She actually saw Carlton catch on fire! Two days ago, she wandered to the spot in the kitchen floor that burned from the pot of grease, and sat right on it. She had her blanket and paci and was just kind of looking around. I think it was her way of making peace with the whole fire thing. She has not mentioned it again, and seems soooooo much more content now that Carlton is home.
BABY #3 AND HOME HEALTH NURSE
He's due in 7 weeks now. Hopefully Carlton will be somewhat healed by then. Last night C got up out of bed and ended up quickly back in because of pain and lightheadedness. He will have a home nurse come out to help me change his dressings every other day. Being a caretaker for your husband is something I didn't think I would experience for decades!
It is a really amazing experience, but I have to stay prayed up for the Lord's strength because it is very taxing mentally, emotionally and physically. Prob increased bc of #3's incessant growing. I have a newfound appreciation and compassion for anyone who has ever been a caretaker themselves. And my husb is not terminally ill, paralyzed or any number of awful circumstances, Plus, it's only day three of me doing it. I've got my head around his 11 medications (11!) and just re-wrapped his arm for the second time since midnight, so I am totally getting the hang of it. Thinking I should have listened to C eons ago and gotten my nursing degree.
"Awwww, mercy, mercy me......"
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